What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and grass is green due to the fact that there is chlorophyll in it.

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Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

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A kid has no friends.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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