An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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who's a slut... you're mom

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

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Why was the 6 year old girl crying? Her step-dad kicked her in the face.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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