A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

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Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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KONY 2012

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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A blackman and an asian are walking down the street they pass eachother exchange looks and continue on with their day

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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Yo mama is so fat she died

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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UN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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