Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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SUCK MY NUTS

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A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Whats the difference between a baby and my freezer? I don't stick my meat in the freezer!

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Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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Miscarriages.

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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alert("Hello");

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops