I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

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What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

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Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

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Logan's gay

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What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

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What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

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Why did Tiger look in the toilet? It doesn't matter, he didn't find anything.

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Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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Everything's looking fine, ma'am. Hope to see you again real soon.

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

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What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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