How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, it is impossible for something to be red all over if there is black and white also.

knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

your mama is so stupid stole a free sample

whats brown and sticky a stick

A frog jumped on the lilly pad, it sank and drown and all of the tadpoles didn't have a mother and inevitably died

A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

how many terminaly ill 5 year old cancer patients does it take to burn to supply enough energy to make toast just 4.5 :)

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

What did the black guy say in the phone? Hello

Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

jibby jobby

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9. Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because 9 was black.

Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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