One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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That awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it would.

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A man is flailing his arms in the ocean. Help me, I'm drowning!, he screams. Some dude runs into the water, drags the man out, and is proclaimed a Hero.

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Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

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A black guy walks into a basketball court.

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

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Q-Whos the best server at Sonic? A-Kevin !

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

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Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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