Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

Why is it bad to have 10 blond girls in a closet at the same time? The closet is a very compacted space and one of them is a claustrophobic.

A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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