A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Why did the boy run down the road? Because he was being chased by a tsunami

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A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

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Random letters vJKkBvCffsgfsjxmsocowdbwfeascbsa

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Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

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three gay men were sitting in a hottub. a condom floats to the surface. why the hell were you watching them?

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Antoni Wilkinsin

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

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How do you get girls to watch a crappy movie? Tell them Taylor Lautner is in it.

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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ur gey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops