roses are brown violets are brown, who took a shit in my garden

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(kid is eating a round fruit) friend: Get me an apple too. Kid: I wish I could The kids friend later realizes that his friend was actually eating a peach.

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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There is a newly wed couple, a biker and his biker lady friends. The newly wed man says to his wife, "Pass the honey, honey". One of the biker chicks looks over. Five minutes later the man says to his wife, "Pass the sugar, sugar". They biker chick looks back at them and then asks the biker man, "Why don't you treat us like that?" " You know your right. Pass the bacon... lovely". And from that day on the bikers lived in peace and harmony.

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What did Charlie do when he lost his golden ticket? He killed his grandpa to get it back.

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An Asian, a white man and a black man were running in a race. The Asian won and the black man came second due to his lack of training and motivation over the past couple of months.

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a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Patient: Doctor Doctor! Doctor: Yes. Patient: I think I'm a moth! Doctor: You don't need a doctor, you need Mental help. Patient: Yes I know. Doctor: Then why are you here? Patient: The light was on.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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Hehe 9/11 Funny Stuff If you know what I mean!!

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What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

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Why is French Fries not a Chinese Food? Answer: Because the Chinese people will get offended.

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Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

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Two horses are playing in a field, One says to the other "Hey, sup" they then continue playing.

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Why did the student cry when he got an F on the test? because his dad beats him.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops