Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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Q.what did god say when he made the first black person? A.oh shit i burnt it.

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Hey Jew. What? Shut up.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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Justin Bieber

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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