Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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What rhymes with you? You.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Women's rights.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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