what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

3 men walk into a bank. They rob the bank and kil 13 hostages.

what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

what do you call an elephant crossing a fish? a elephant fish

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Reeves Christopher

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

where do you hide a black mans paycheck? somewhere he would never find it

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

You know what's interesting about Polish people? Nothing.

Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

A moose walks into a store and asks the lady where the potatoes are. She says "isle five". he walks to isle five and there were no potatoes

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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