why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Hi there! As the Director of Anti-Joke, I would like to thank the users for their contributions so far. We are currently raising money in order to gradually end our dependence on advertisements for revenue. Your participation is so important to us, and in order to continue our service we request a minimum donation of $100 for continued use of the Anti-Joke website. Please submit your payment by the end of November 2012. All major credit cards are accepted, as is PayPal. Thank you again for your cooperation and understanding as we grow in our services.

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why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

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Have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. It's okay, neither has he.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

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What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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Knock knock, who's there? Doctor. Doctor who?

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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Why was the chipmunk watching TV? Because a new Family Guy was on.

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

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how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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