Why was the giant scorpion sad? Because the Holocaust killed his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

i killed my family

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you stop a rhino from charging? Kill it

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A seven foot tall kindergartener walks into a bar. He is reduced to tears after being ridiculed for his inordinate height and unappealing physical appearance. A bartender then proceeds to escort him out of the bar for being underaged. -BG_Shank_A

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If life gives you AIDs, make lemonaids.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

On the 1st day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . Windows 95 for my PC On the 2nd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 3rd day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 4th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 6th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 7th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 8th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 9th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 9 apps a crashin' 8 megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 10th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 11th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me . . . 12 illegal operations 11 instructions faulty 10 modes not supported 9 apps a crashin' 8 Megs overflowin' 7 files missin' 6 ints conflictin' 5 eighty six 4 sectors bad 3 ports not responding 2 GPFs and Windows 95 for my PC

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You know what's funny? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. Why did Justin Beiber fall off the ladder? A. He was trying to reach puberty

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's the funniest joke? wish i knew

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops