What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

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Want to hear a funny joke Rojo Bunchie

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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SpiderMan, under that mask and your superhero clothes who are You really? Under these clothes, I...Am.... naked

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops