Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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whats black and white? a zebra

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like most people my age. im 27

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--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

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Barack Obama.

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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