Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, now that i think of it, roses come in many colors And violets are actually violet in color, thus the name

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“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

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Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Okay, yeah red, but you wont ever get to see it because you have gone stale.

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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god made the sea god helped invent the first wheel but as you know he also made me a really big deal !

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

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FUCK YOU

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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