a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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There is a bus driving down the street, suddenly a man jumps out of the buss and splatters on to the sidewalk, why does he jump out? the buss driver was asian

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw a herd of Elephants coming over the hill? Oh look, a herd of Elephants coming over the hill.

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What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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knock knock. no one answered so the man at the door went home.

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three retards, a Jew, 4 Mexicans, and an Eskimo go to the grocery store. Windex is on sale. The Jew bought artichokes.

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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One day a man walked into a wall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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