What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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if a fat guy in a red suit comes into your house on christmas. its not santa your about to get raped from chewy(:

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was shot in the face

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

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Eat My Food!!! Joking I dont have any food

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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What's a joke? Funny

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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Im sorry Dylan Hodge Jamie Stegman

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Justin Bieber.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his icecream? A: His arm was chopped off by a ninja

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Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops