So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did samba hurt her head? Because she fell out of her mum muff

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the clown want a new bike? Don't ask me, clowns are allowed to want things too

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? You might spill your beer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops