What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

A: Do you like it B: No

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

the WNBA

Whats the difference between a black an white guy? They have different skin tones

What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

whats a mexicans favorite sport? cross counrty

Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

chirs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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