Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

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Donald trump walks into the whitehouse. He's there for a business meeting with the new president.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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fjasdklfjklasdjfasdfk .... sorry i have terets!

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

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Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

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why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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What does a blonde say when she being raped? Ow it hurts stop... What does the guys who's raping her say? Oh shut up you know you like it...

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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