What do you call a man that eats a sandwich? Hungry.

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth she has lacked a jaw

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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why did the little boy cross the road? because he had been raped.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

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What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

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Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

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What's better than winning a gold at the paralympic Walking

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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Why did the the black man die? Because he had an incurable disease.

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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