A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how you throw 'em.

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Q: Why did the irishman walk into the bar A: Because he wanted a drink

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How's the weather? Good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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