An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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A black man sees a watch that he want. He then purchases it with his hard earned money.

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What do black people eat? Food.

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

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What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

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A whore walks in to a bar. She soon finds her John and they leave to his hotel room.

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A Jewish man walks by a penny.

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Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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