im gay

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

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Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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Jesus walks into a church only to be touched inappropriately.

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how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

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#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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When you cross a bird on the sidewalk what do you do??? Run in big circles.

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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There was once a man with a penis so huge, his girlfriend liked their sexual experiences very much. A year later they got married and had kids, however the man got fired from his accounting job and it all went downhill.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Whats long and hard and women like to suck on them? A popsicle or long lollipop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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