What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware River? Men, to the boats.

What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

What's funnier than 24? 25

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

Penis

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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