why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

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Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

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roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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why did sally fall off the swing cause she had no arms knock knock who's there? not sally

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Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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What did the blonde say when she found a dead bird on the sidewalk? "Aww, look at the poor dead bird!"

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because her family lived in the countryside and her family's income was very far below average and in the time of her miraculous breakthrough, automobiles were for the wealthy families and obviously her family was not wealthy. She wouldn't have been able to drive even if she wasn't blind or def. The economy pretty much hated her and her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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