Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. I don't know, I've had a bad day, I can't think straight. Why do you keep asking me these questions? Always talking at me, everyday it's the same - why can't you just shut up?! I would be better off dead, then it would stop, this suffocating blackness. I need to escape...I'm going to do it tonight...pills, something like that...I don't care any longer. Goodbye.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man was driving in his BMW one day when a mini passed him out on the fast lane. The BMW driver thought 'i can't have that!' so he sped up and overtook the mini. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention and he drove into the back of a school bus. Ironically the bus contained the mini driver's 3 daughters, he was driving so fast because they had forgotten to bring their lunch and he was trying to catch up with the bus so he could give them their sandwiches. There were no survivors of the crash, except for the mini driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A guy walks into a restaurant. "What would you like?" says the waiter. "A glass of orange juice," replies the man.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than the Holocaust? A second Holocaust. What's worse than a second Holocaust? Being raped by Santa Claus. What's worse than that? NOTHING.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? She is a goner.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's bad about 4 asians getting shot? A: There could've been five

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I'm at my grandmothers house right now

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? I eat pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where do you find a vegetable? Where you left him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops