Q: Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? A: Neither did she...

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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Jane asked her husband why he was crying, he replied "Because i have extremely agressive cancer" hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....Cancer

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Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

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Why is the black guy afraid of the white guy? He's not, it's the other way around.

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

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A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

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Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

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._____________________. Whale!

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops