How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

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Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

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What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

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Women

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What did the tree say to the boy? Nothing. As i recall, trees are unable to speak and or show signs of emotion.

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What's the difference between a car and a sack of dead babies? I don't keep a car in my garage.

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No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

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How do you piss off a gypsy? Curse at him

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Like a bit of a cozy fight or something.

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How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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Feminism

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

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How did the blonde die raking leaves? She fell out of the tree!

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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