Why did the man hang himself? Because his pistol misfired.

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What do you call a fish with no fins? Dead.

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Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

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pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

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How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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When was George Washington born? Who the hell knows. He's older than dirt.

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

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Obama being reelected.

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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koj yog ib tug tsoob qaib eater, uas nyiam mus rau Peer li qub poj niam qhov chaw mos raws li ib tug nyiam ua! (Google Translate may help)

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

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haha look at that guys shirt! what's wrong with it? i don't know.. nothing i guess

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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whats worse than a dead baby two dead babies what could be worse than that? constapation

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Justin Bieber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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