What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

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Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

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What happened to the homosexual jiggalo? He ended up getting aids from having anal sex with various men which is not the best idea because the anus where poop comes from.

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-What animal has the best vision? -I hate when you try to talk dirty during sex

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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Your dad is so gay, he lovingly marries another man and selflessly adopts you.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

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Q: What's more silly than the idea of a wealthy, successful black man? A: A Clown

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Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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