Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

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Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

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What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Obama walks into a hospital....

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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I have an erection My mom!

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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The Earth is a nice place to live.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

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HOLY SHIT!!!!

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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