Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

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Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

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My therapist says that I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!

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Stealth baseballs record

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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obama

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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What is the difference?

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wow, I screwed up, Give me head.

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Knock Knock. Go Away!

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What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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