why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

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Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

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the top 6 dictators who have died this year Moammar Gadhafi Kim Jong IL Osama bin ladden Saddam Husein Steve jobs Internet Explorer

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How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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Why didn't the kid get a bike for Christmas? Because his parents died and Santa's not real

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Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

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i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

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why is six afraid of seven? because six is a rapist

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Where there is a will, there is generally a grieving family... I miss you, dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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