When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

What has 2 legs and smells like fish A fish with 2 legs

Q: Why did the grandma forget to take her pills? A: She died in a tornado

Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

You bumder!

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

Why was the man whistling? He was calling his friend.

Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

Can midgets still have big dreams?

this is not a joke.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

how do you complete an exam. dont be kaizen.

Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...