A guy walks into a bar carrying an octopus under his arm. The bartender asks him, "say, buddy, what's with the octopus?" and the man replies, "this is the most intelligent octopus in the world. In fact, I bet you $100 that it can play any instrument you give it." The bartender snickers at the other patrons, and puts $100 on the bar. He motions the man over to the piano by the wall. The man puts the octopus on the piano, but it nothing happens. The octopus is dead, because it's been out of the water for a while. The bartender looks at the man sadly, as two psychiatric orderlies from the local mental hospital take the visitor away to the looney bin, after another patron called the police. The bartender never gets his $100, and now he has to clean up the godawful mess on his piano.

A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

joke under this line wins _________________________

why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

What hapenz when u drnk very hot cup of tea after lunch ............:-> nothing ... Cup becomes empty

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

your mom's so fat that even the biggest case of cancer couldn't brake through her flubber its so big

what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

Why do I hate food? I don't.

why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

69

One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

What did the children say when the magician pulled a rabbit out of his hat? Nothing, but the parents called Animal Control, and the magician was imprisoned after a dog-fighting ring was discovered in Michael Vick's estate.

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

Why did the black guy go to jail? Because he committed an illegal crime.

yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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