Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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How many Hairdressers does it take to change a lightbulb. Usually one.

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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Can you guess what one black child got while passing through an all-white neighborhood in the middle of the night? Home safely.

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what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

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Dig Bick Your dislexic

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Why did the black man run when he heard police sirens? Because he was parked in a handicap spot

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How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

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What is the black kid down the street getting for his birthday? Well first of all, his name is Pat. And he asked his parents for an Xbox that he will likely receive, and I assume a variety of other gifts from friends and family.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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