Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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What did james say on his bitrhday? There was no birthday because he was aborted but he said ''crunch'' anyway

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Ever heard nobobys perfect well ill name my kid nobody therefore he will perfect

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How do you get your girlfriend to become more enthusiastic about swallowing? Stick your dick in Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

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what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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Why can't a dinosaur clap its hands? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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