whos a sick fuck? jake morris

kill yourself....with a cigarette

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

What happens if you Put a Mental Patient in a cage He goes crazy, Develops schizophrenia and Eventually dies of Many Incurable Diseases

How did the young boy cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

what happened when glen haire jumped of a high building? he died.

What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

How do you spell eight? 8

Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

Ian's mind Elevator music

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...