when a friend comes over and says: hey, do you have a bathroom??? NO!!! I shit in my yard!!!!!

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Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

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i just got pulled over by a cop. he asked me if i had been drinking, i said no. he asked me to step out of my car so he could look inside i looked nervous, and had no other choice to step out. he knew there was something in there he looked in and saw it THE REFRIDGERATOR

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Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

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from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Knock Knock I'm sorry but the new don't ask don't tell laws require me to not answer but do feel free to come in for some tea.

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm sorry I don't know you but I think I might have run over your dog!

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

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I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Maybe because it had escaped from the farm and as it doesn't have full conciousness, it couldn't distinguish between grass and the asphalt, so it happened to cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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