Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

What's white, black and tan? The people of planet earth.

What is worse than Shaq's free throw percentage? The free throw percentages of Reggie Evans, Bo Outlaw, Andris Biedrins, Wilt Chamberlain, Chris Dudley and Ben Wallace.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Why was Billy laughing? He was driving the bus Why did Bobby drop his ice cream? Billy put the bus in reverse Why was Johnny crying? Sally and Bobby stole the money from his bank account and now he is poor and homeless

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

Dislike this.

Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

Statues: Show what great people look like, if birds shit all over them.

A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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