Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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