An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

A man walked into a bar and said ow.

If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

what the hell happened to your face

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

Where do bananas come from? Mexico

Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

Oh look, I've found my knife

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...