whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

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what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

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ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

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I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He had nobody to go with :)

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Why are the new york knicks called the new york knicks.? no one gives a crap

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops