What did the little girl who lost her baby teeth want for Christmas? A pony.

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Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

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How did the dyslexic, purple horse commit suicide? It jumped off the Grand Canyon.

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They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

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Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

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Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

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This is a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

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What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

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What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

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I found a new way to be condescending... Thats when you talk down to people.

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What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

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Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

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watch a i d s left

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops