How come dinosaurs don't talk? Because they're dead.

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

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Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

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What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

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roses are red violets are blue i just made you remember two girls one cup

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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