What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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I can't wait to eat this bagel! Yes you can. Yeah, I guess you're right.

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? Because he had no arms!

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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What happen to the girl that did the splits. Her legs broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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