Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

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EGGPLANT

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

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i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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The Morman Religion.

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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This dog can only sniff marijuana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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